Foster Further

 Today a relative called me very upset about their request for an IEP for their child. The school was not giving the parents what they wanted, i.e. a parapro to supervise the child and make sure he completed his schoolwork. The parents have legitimate concerns about the child. The child is from foster care and engaging in a slew of frustrating behaviors--lying, stealing, rushing through assignments and turning them in half done, failing classes, etc. The boy is in 6th grade and already on his second school in the less than a year he's been with this family.  It was a long phone call. So many layers of frustration and some very long stories. Here's the problem: the school isn't going to do that. You don't get an IEP for not doing your homework. You sure as hell don't get a parapro anymore for anything less than being on a feeding tube and/or being criminally violent. I tried to use medical insurance as an illustration for how special ed works. While a doctor can see

 Did the job interview for the nanny position.  -She asked if we should cancel since it was only in the 50s with a chance of rain. -She came 10 minutes late because she couldn't find her keys. -She has two inch long fake nails. -Her favorite thing to do is watch movies. -Despite the fact that she's been nannying for two families and working in a daycare, she could not think of a single craft or experiment or project that she's done before and that she'd like to do again. I asked the question three times, with variations. Each time...just a straight up no. Couldn't think of a single thing she's ever done with any child ever.  So, did she read the job description? Because the title I put on the job was, literally: "Outdoor Enthusiast". I can guarantee those two inch nails have never touched a bit of nature, ever. And if you can't go outside in the 50s where we live, she must only go outside about two months of the year. I went home and reread her rep

 Today I do my second job interview for a nanny/tutor type position we'll need next fall to help with home schooling. I'll do the main subjects during the morning but then I need someone to get them outside, do lighter stuff like science and crafts, and possibly take them to any classes we enroll them in, during the afternoon while I'm working. I've written up the questions--a mix of basic background info plus some situational/behavioral issues to comment on. But, of course, what I really want to know I struggle to frame. Will you make the same decisions I'd make? Or will you somehow, inadvertently, promote the negative behaviors I'm trying to eradicate? Will you love my kids just enough to give that extra dose of patience when they are trying you to no end...but not enough that they miss you terribly when you go? Speaking of which, will you be reliable? Will you be on time and make it the whole year without bailing for some better job?  I am most inclined to wa

Jane is very rarely ill. She has a gut of steel (I wonder if this is due to her first years in an unclean environment as I've heard kids exposed to a lot develop a strong immune system--if so, it's the one positive to come out of her home life.)  But this weekend she had a fever for three days. She would not tell me that anything else hurt (throat, tummy, headache, etc.). But, she also had that look on her face when I'd ask that told me she wasn't sure what the right answer was but she cared more about telling me what she imagined I wanted to hear than the truth. Just one example of a time when it's so frustrating to live with a child who cannot tell the truth. Just simply asking a kid if their throat hurts and then watching them go into this neurotic spiral. Exhausting. Anyway, I finally got her in for a covid test and it was negative, and she's been fever free for 24hrs so she's back at school today. Doc had no idea why she had the fever, no ear infection,

 Since Jane came to our home I have noted that she uses indirect vocabulary when having a conversation with me. It's only when some factual/informational is being shared. If she's telling a story then she uses full details and descriptive words and good action verbs to describe everything fully.  Today is a perfect example. We're doing a kitchen remodel and today we put new hardware on the drawers and cupboard doors. Previously there was no hardware at all. The kids ran inside, skidded to a stop at the sight of Gus and I working, and Jane blurted out, "I think something is different." A second later, Kate exclaimed, "You put on new openers!" (She didn't know the word for drawer pulls and knobs.) So, the first and most important question: why does this annoy me?  It sets my teeth on edge every damn time. Why? I can easily ignore her stutter without the tiniest bit of irritation. But baby-talking and indirect speech drive me batty.  My best guess is th

 I decided to sew new curtains for my new kitchen. I love the fabric. I love the curtain style I chose. I love nothing else. First, I sewed the curtains to fit the current rods but then I decided to buy different rods. First set of rods--too big, returned. Second set of rods--okay.  New curtains on new rods--bad. One too short; one too long. Hemmed, adjusted, shortened, lengthened, added trim.  Put up completely altered curtains--hated placement of rods. Moved rods up; moved rods down. So many screw holes in old wood. My apologies. Went back to original rod on one window but kept new rod on other window. Considered adding third curtain with new rod to big window I'd previously decided not to do any curtains on at all. Except I don't have enough of the fabric to do the window I'd decided not to put curtains on.  I have three windows in my kitchen all looking slightly different. This is stupid.  I hate it all now.  So? First I browsed through Etsy and Pinterest to bombard my