From the last post of feeling so good, feeling so in love with my little girls, feeling so at peace and happy with the world...we come to today. Today I am frightened, threatened, angry, frustrated.
Awhile ago Kate was supposed to have a 30 month well child checkup. When the social worker told me about this I totally blew it off. I figured by the time they'd get around to caring the adoption would be final and we could skate by. I made this decision not on my own but when I took her in for her flu shot and the nurse told me that she's up to date on all her shots. I asked them about a 30 month checkup and they looked at me funny and said, uh, nobody does that anymore.
Okay, if the doctor's office says it isn't needed then I'm not about to pitch a fit trying to make them do something they can't even bill for.
Last Monday the state's official adoption agency okayed the adoption. But, there was a delay in taking that paperwork to the judge because the subsidy paperwork hadn't been "certified" (I don't even know what this means.) Once that paperwork was certified the whole packet would go to the judge, hopefully this week (delay last week due to Thanksgiving).
Now today I get an email from the foster care agency saying they're opening a "special investigation" on us due to failure to complete the 30 month well child checkup. The one that no pediatrician around here recommends and that the supervisor at the adoption agency herself told me she's never heard of and certainly didn't take her children to.
I wrote back an email again detailing all that we've done with the additional info that I took Kate to the Urgent Care yesterday, a Sunday afternoon, and begged them to do the checkup but they couldn't because they couldn't bill for it because IT DOESN'T EXIST!
My email concluded with the threat that if this special investigation delayed the adoption by even one day I'd file a formal complaint.
Guess what, an hour later I get a phone call from the adoption agency (hence the conversation where she agreed with me that nobody does these 30 month visits) giving me tips on how to resolve the special investigation quickly. She said I'm to get a statement from the pediatrician in writing that they don't recommend or perform these checkups and that statement, along with the visit we ARE doing today because, thank god, somehow there was a cancellation today and they can squeeze us in (normally they book these things 3 months out), should resolve everything.
But, yes, first our paperwork has to go BACK to the state's agency for "re-certification" with the "addendum" stating why the visit was delayed. I am so, so, so pissed.
This is all a game to our foster care agency. A game of proving themselves right. Throwing around their weight to make us comply. Being right instead of doing right. A game so petty, so risky to my children, I find it the epitome of evil.
And meanwhile every single altercation with them makes me want to curl up and cry. I'm so deeply afraid that this is going to cascade out of control. That there will be one delay after another. That they're on a vendetta now and will stop by the house unannounced seeking something to find out of compliance. That at some point in the midst of all these delays some family member will come out of the woodwork and make a claim for the girls.
I cannot have any peace until this process is absolutely done. I cannot relax and love and bond with my children until the threat of their removal is completely gone.
Awhile ago Kate was supposed to have a 30 month well child checkup. When the social worker told me about this I totally blew it off. I figured by the time they'd get around to caring the adoption would be final and we could skate by. I made this decision not on my own but when I took her in for her flu shot and the nurse told me that she's up to date on all her shots. I asked them about a 30 month checkup and they looked at me funny and said, uh, nobody does that anymore.
Okay, if the doctor's office says it isn't needed then I'm not about to pitch a fit trying to make them do something they can't even bill for.
Last Monday the state's official adoption agency okayed the adoption. But, there was a delay in taking that paperwork to the judge because the subsidy paperwork hadn't been "certified" (I don't even know what this means.) Once that paperwork was certified the whole packet would go to the judge, hopefully this week (delay last week due to Thanksgiving).
Now today I get an email from the foster care agency saying they're opening a "special investigation" on us due to failure to complete the 30 month well child checkup. The one that no pediatrician around here recommends and that the supervisor at the adoption agency herself told me she's never heard of and certainly didn't take her children to.
I wrote back an email again detailing all that we've done with the additional info that I took Kate to the Urgent Care yesterday, a Sunday afternoon, and begged them to do the checkup but they couldn't because they couldn't bill for it because IT DOESN'T EXIST!
My email concluded with the threat that if this special investigation delayed the adoption by even one day I'd file a formal complaint.
Guess what, an hour later I get a phone call from the adoption agency (hence the conversation where she agreed with me that nobody does these 30 month visits) giving me tips on how to resolve the special investigation quickly. She said I'm to get a statement from the pediatrician in writing that they don't recommend or perform these checkups and that statement, along with the visit we ARE doing today because, thank god, somehow there was a cancellation today and they can squeeze us in (normally they book these things 3 months out), should resolve everything.
But, yes, first our paperwork has to go BACK to the state's agency for "re-certification" with the "addendum" stating why the visit was delayed. I am so, so, so pissed.
This is all a game to our foster care agency. A game of proving themselves right. Throwing around their weight to make us comply. Being right instead of doing right. A game so petty, so risky to my children, I find it the epitome of evil.
And meanwhile every single altercation with them makes me want to curl up and cry. I'm so deeply afraid that this is going to cascade out of control. That there will be one delay after another. That they're on a vendetta now and will stop by the house unannounced seeking something to find out of compliance. That at some point in the midst of all these delays some family member will come out of the woodwork and make a claim for the girls.
I cannot have any peace until this process is absolutely done. I cannot relax and love and bond with my children until the threat of their removal is completely gone.
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