For the very first time I lied to a birth family member. I've been brutally honest even when it caused an uproar. I've been honest because I was personally committed to always telling the truth. Until now. Because this lie may actually be the best way to preserve Jane's relationship with her birth family. At our last video call with Grandma Jane seemed uninterested, unengaged, not showing any real emotion. I struggled to find things to prompt her to talk about. Over the next two weeks I waited and she never asked for another call. In the third week I casually brought up the topic and she did not really respond, certainly didn't ask for another call. Finally, yesterday I point blank asked if she wanted to do a video call and she said the word yes but her whole body language said no. It was clear that she was saying yes because she thought she was supposed to, not because she wanted to. So, I took her body language rather than her words and made the decision that we...
The main characters: Beth and Theo (parents), Three bio sons: Seth (18), Gus (14), and James (4). Two adoptive daughters: Jane (4) and Kate (3). Our foster-to-adopt girls were placed with us Nov, 18 and adopted Feb, 20. All names are pseudonyms to protect our privacy. Beth is a special education teacher. Theo is an IT guy. We become foster parents in Aug, 2018. This blog is about foster care, adoption, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Sensory Integration Disorders.
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